“Someday I hope you get the chance to live like you were dying” - Tim McGraw

 

I’m so grateful I got cancer. I’ve been shown first hand how quickly life can change. From my invasive lobular breast cancer diagnosis to my double mastectomy was a matter of weeks. And then it was straight into chemo. I realised getting a life threatening diagnosis isn’t the time to start ticking things off your bucket list. I would lie in bed feeling horrendous and just wishing I could sit up… there was no way I could take on any challenges, however small. I  could only take on one…and that was to survive.

 

I promised myself if I got better I’d do the things I wanted to do. I live in constant fear that the cancer will return and if it does I don’t want to have regrets about things I could’ve done. 

 

I’ve done some challenges over the years (breaking a Guinness world record, climbing Ben Nevis, bungee jumping, the Virtual London Marathon, the Ride 100) but I have so much more I want to do. So leading up to my 40th birthday I made a list of 40 things I wanted to do that year. Well that was 2020 and while I did some, it was a bit of a washout. 

 

As part of my cancer treatment I had my ovaries removed which put me in the menopause. While I could deal with the hot flushes and other menopausal delights there was something I hadn’t expected…the effect on my ADHD. I’d always suspected I had ADHD but it was always fun and exciting. When the menopause hit the ADHD symptoms became insurmountable. I felt again like I had missed my opportunity to achieve anything on my list. 

 

But now I think “Why on earth did I stop just because I missed a deadline?” I’m still here. I’m still healthy. And after getting my ADHD diagnosis and treatment I feel ready to take on the world again! 

 

So, here it is: I’m reviving the list. Call it Bucket List 2.0….or 40 things in my 45th year….or…oh Let’s just go with bucket list! 

 

Maybe I’ll even inspire someone else to start living like they’re dying—except, you know, without the whole dying part.